How to Live Your Core Values (Even When They Clash): A Guide to Alignment, Not Perfection

Do you know your core values? More importantly—are you actually living them?

In a world full of noise, pressure, and endless “shoulds,” your core values are the compass that point you back to who you really are. They help you make clear decisions, build healthy relationships, and pursue goals that actually matter.

But here's the truth no one talks about:

Core values sometimes clash—and that doesn’t mean you’re failing.

It means you're human.

As a single mom, real estate broker, investor, and podcast host, I’ve had to learn how to live in alignment with my values without expecting perfection.

What Are Core Values and Why Do They Matter?

Your core values are the deeply held beliefs that guide your behavior, decisions, and vision for life. They are not the same as morals or desires. They’re not fleeting preferences. They’re foundational truths that define how you move through the world.

According to Gino Wickman’s book Traction, core values are essential for businesses—but I believe they’re even more essential for building a meaningful life.

Here are my 8 core values:

Authentic

Discipline

Connection

Family

Abundance

Wealth

Success

Adventure

Everything I do—from parenting my kids to running my company—is filtered through these values.

How to Identify Your Core Values

To start living your values, you need to get radically honest about what they are. Here's how:

Reflect on moments when you felt most proud or fulfilled—what values were present?

Think about what frustrates or drains you—those usually conflict with your values.

Narrow it down to 5–10 values that feel non-negotiable.

Write them down and make them visible. Put them on your mirror, in your planner, or your vision board.

Want a tip? Don’t confuse your core values with your preferences. For example, liking quiet time doesn’t mean “introversion” is a core value. Dig deeper. What does that quiet time give you? Maybe it's peace. Maybe clarity. That’s the value.

Living Your Values Daily

Once you’ve identified your core values, the real work begins: aligning your life with them.

✅ Use them to set goals.
If you value connection, set a goal to call or visit friends regularly. If you value adventure, book the trip or take that leap in your career.

✅ Filter decisions through them.
When you’re faced with a choice—big or small—ask: Does this align with my values?

✅ Evaluate your relationships and work.
Are you surrounded by people who support your values? Does your job honor what’s most important to you?

✅ Revisit them regularly.
Your life evolves—so check in every few months. Are you living in alignment… or drifting?

When Core Values Clash (And What to Do About It)

Here’s where it gets real.

Sometimes, values collide.
For me, the biggest tension is between family and wealth.

I’m a single mom. I want to be there for every school project, game, and late-night heart-to-heart. But I’m also a business owner building something that creates generational wealth for my kids. And that sometimes means working nights, taking calls on vacation, or showing homes on weekends.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

✨ You’re not failing your values—you’re navigating them.
✨ Balance isn’t daily. It’s seasonal.
✨ You can honor both values over time, even if not always at once.

Give yourself grace. Zoom out.
What looks like imbalance in the moment may actually be aligned with your long-term vision.

Why Living in Alignment Feels So Damn Good

When your actions match your values, something shifts.

🌟 You feel more confident because you’re no longer pretending.
🌟 You feel more fulfilled because your goals mean something.
🌟 You feel more peace because your life reflects your truth.

And if you’ve ever felt stuck, resentful, or lost—
It might be because you’re living in conflict with what you truly value.

Final Thoughts: Aligned, Not Perfect

You don’t need to get it all right.
You don’t need a perfectly balanced life.

You just need to stay aware, honest, and committed to living like you mean it.

Let your values guide you—and when in doubt, come back to them.
They’ll always point you home.

🔥 Bonus: Journal Prompts to Reconnect with Your Core Values

• What are my top 5–8 core values?

• What decisions have I made recently that align with those values?

• Where do I feel tension between values, and how can I make peace with that?

• What’s one action I can take this week to live more aligned?
  

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